Networking, Room-working, what works for you?

I received an email today inviting me to pay around £60 to learn how to 'work a room with ease and style'. I didn't read the email fully, but it seemed to be a workshop to tell you how to act when going to networking events. This confused me a little; when I go to networking events, I just go. Granted, some people may be shy, and need a little help. Others may need 'toning down'. But this is just part of life: it's what we do to fit in with any social group.

I'm different when I'm with my husband, when I'm at work, when I'm at a networking event, when I'm with the research team, and so on. I don't believe any of these people see a deceptive version of myself, merely an edited one. But it's not a conscious thing, and I'm not sure that making it into one would be of any use. How are you supposed to network when it's not really you who is networking?

People are attracted to others for a variety of reasons. This is why we don't all end up going after the same men. Something one person might find attractive will drive another person crazy. Something that catches one person's eye will pass entirely unnoticed by someone else.

If I go to an event and see someone standing alone, looking like they're watching what's going on intently and paying attention, whilst not really engaging with anyone, they'll immediately catch my attention. Why? Because I like people who listen, who understand, who ask intelligent questions and who don't bound into the office with energy bursting from every pore and enquire about my personal life. For someone else, this may not be the case. They may notice those who are moving around, glass of wine in hand, chatting happily away to everyone they come across. Perhaps they prefer an enthusiastic, bubbly extrovert; whether this be for personal or professional reasons.

I think the excessive grooming of yourself in order to fit in with what other people might like may, in fact, end up being detrimental and will quite possibly seem fake. If the aforementioned quiet, watching person morphed into the bubbly, chatty one, then I'd be less inclined to approach them, because they may not be what I'm looking for.

There have been far too many 'I's in this post. Tell me what you guys think.